So I've never actually blogged before. I am thinking I will use it as some form of therapy and my life is relatively interesting and people might want to read about it. So here's a little bit about myself to start. An introduction to me.
I am in my late twenties, tall, fairly attractive (need to lose about 15lbs, but great rack), most people would describe me as farther ahead of my peers as far as career goes. I am intelligent with a high I.Q., I suffer from bouts of depression, I love my family and the majority of my friends. I think from the outside people think I'm normal. At work I don't think anyone would guess what a wonderful mess my life really is.
The history: I was over weight, tall, and nerdy in middle school. Leaving me not the girl the boys wanted to date in those silly little middle school relationships that don't really matter, but it made me hate myself anyways. Then my parents sent me to private catholic all girls high school. Where almost no one knew of my past. I was free to be who ever I wanted to be. I was no longer over weight but had grown into myself and I was hot. I started sleeping with everything that moved. Then started experimenting with girls. I spent the beginning of my freshman year in the bathroom eating pussy. It was great. Lots of attention which made me feel good and the constant orgasms weren't bad either. Then I started meeting boys from our brother school through my new "bathroom" friends. I met a wonderful guy who was saving himself for marriage. He thought me sleeping with women wasn't really cheating so I got the best of both worlds. I didn't have to have sex with him, just dick sucking, could continue feeling safe having sex with women, but had a date for the weekends and school dances. Plus my parents loved him. We dated all four years of high school. Eventually he decided I was the girl he was going to marry so we had sex. Needless to say it was always uneventful and he didn't eat pussy like the girls did. I continued to sleep with women and he got jealous and we broke up. I then became a slut. I tried every guy out like I was seeking some sex machine. None of them could make me cum. I had other boyfriends but never stayed faithful. Then college came. I was having threesomes and orgi's. I was out of sexual control. Then I decided to tell my parents that I was into girls. A friend of mine introduced me to a friend of his who was a lesbian. Thought she might be able to help me deal with the mess if there was one. She walked in and I realized I knew her. We had gone to high school together. Not friends or anything but we knew the other. She remembered me as the captain of the cheerleading squad who dated the captain of the football team, said I was that girl, a total bitch, and that I was to skinny. She mentioned in later conversations being shocked that it was me standing in front of her telling her that I was gay. She jumped right on it though. She did everything she she could to win me over. Although, she wasn't my type at all. Really butch looking. I liked sexy chicks with big asses who liked to dirty talk and fuck for hours. She was a lady even though she looked the way she did. There was something about her that was so easy to love. We had a relationship for 7+ years. I cheated on her in the beginning. I traveled a lot to Georgia for a job that I had so I had a girlfriend down there too. Slept with my boss at one point, but then committed to her. I thought I loved her. Now realize that I didn't no what love was, but didn't want to treat to her badly or hurt her. So remained faithful. Plus my parents adored her. Didn't want me to be gay but they dealt. My life took a swift turn. I got cancer. She became really fem. I got better. She quit her job. We moved due to my career. She was a house wife. Then she wanted a baby that I wasn't ready for. I got laid off. She never got pregnant. We moved back home. We bought a house. I was fucking miserable. I told her I didn't love her. She moved into the guest bedroom. Tried to get me back any way she could. It was pitiful. She told me I could fuck who ever I wanted just as long as I stayed with her. She was bad in bed, couldn't keep up, couldn't cook, was not ambitious, didn't understand politics, she just wasn't smart. It was terrible. I would stay at work for hours after I had to just so I didn't have to go home to her. Anyways, the night after I told her it was over, I met this sweet little thing at a bar. She resembled Eva Mendez. She was in law school, sexy as hell, and whispered in my ear, "I would give anything to have you in between my legs at this very moment." I went home with her. She was so much fun. Felt like a kid again. The sex was great and she was a crazy slut. I felt guilty going home to my ex sitting on the couch crying, because she "missed us", but not guilty enough. I was a pimp again. Out everynight with different girls and what not. It was a blast.
Then my world flipped upside down one night in a bar. I was out with four of my friends. All straight chicks. One of them sits on the lap of some dude. He's with four of his friends. So we're evenly matched. I'm not really interested in conversation with any of them as they're all drunk and well men. One of them starts talking to me. He's drunk but smart enough so that he still has control over his wit. He's funny and we started arguing about sports and politics. He's interesting. The bar is about to close and my friends are hammered. The boys offer to let us hang out at there place since it's across the street and will give everyone a chance to sober up before they drive. I go to take a piss in the bar bathroom and the guy I was talking to grabs my arm spins me around and sticks his tongue in my mouth. It was so strange I hadnt' kissed a guy in a very long time probably 7 years or more. His face was hairy and his tongue was huge felt like a sausage flopping around in my mouth. The kiss ended and I was freaked went to the bathroom and contemplated the strangest thoughts ever. By the time I was wiping I had decided to have a one night stand with him. I was gonna fuck a guy? I couldn't even believe it but I figured why not it had been awhile. Maybe it would be different since I was older and less repulsive. Plus he made me feel safe. I knew I was in good hands...
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